I can hardly believe I read a book from start to finish today.  Wes pops his head in the room and says, “so, got anything planned for supper?”  It was 7 pm.

From reading so intently I lean now into the question of Why I write?  What’s it all for?  You see I quite enjoy blogging.  I get to both use my visual creativity and my writing all in one space.

In fact: I used to give myself essays to write about when I was a kid.  Yes, you can feel free to call me a geek and at 38 I won’t care.  Was that weird?

But it still doesn’t give the why.  The blogging world has beautiful people in it and I love to be inspired.  Jeff Goins, a great writing mentor and blogger, believes that there’s a conversation on the internet.  He says it’s up to you if you want to be in it.  (paraphrased)  The answer is, sometimes I do, and sometimes I don’t.

By nature I’m shy and not the first to initiate friendship.  Women are tricky and to be frank, sometimes quite dangerous.  Can you see I have trust issues here?  This would boil down to my idiosyncratic upbringing and how adoption has affected me.  Another story.

What I have been surprised about is how much writing is actually healing me of some of this baggage that jumps around in my monkey brain.  It is actually taking away the claws that dig in and cause the black emotions.  This writing, is the private type.  My connection with God.  You won’t find it here on cyberspace.

My prayers are found in the play of words.  A creative way that God has made me to connect with Him.  I know some people who meet him on the road when they run, when they play piano, when they draw, tend to their animals.  Mine is through words and lenses.  Sometimes music.  Music is almost too powerful for me and still weakens my knees, like I’m in the presence of Him.  You likely have a way that is unique to you to connect to the Creator.

So maybe this writing is just a gift from Him.  There’s no need to answer why.

Thanks for listening to my rambles so far.  I appreciate all my readers and the nice comments.  You’ve encouraged me.  Hopefully you’re not thinking, “oh no, what have we done!”  Well, it’s too late.  Writing is now a habit.

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